Ask yourself, Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
When we’re worried, we are tightly attached to how we want things to be, rather than relaxing into accepting whatever might happen when we put forth our best effort.
As a recovered perfectionist myself here is a few ways to overcome perfectionist tendencies:
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- Focus on WHY you’re doing something, not WHAT you’re doing
So why do you do what you do? That’s the question you need to answer. Only then will you understand what matters and what doesn’t.
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- Don’t rush
It’s okay if you don’t have it all figured out just yet. It’s okay to feel unsure about life, about your decisions. There are endless possibilities for you, you will see!
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- Don’t compare your process to others
Most people tend to compare their weaknesses with others strengths, but there will always be someone doing better than you on some measure. Always.
If you think winning in life is about being better or having more than others, your comparisons hold your happiness hostage. Comparing yourself to others is a race you can never win.
Focus on your own progress. Don’t forget that we all have our own battles, and you have yours too. You may not know it but they may feel as lost and as afraid as you do.
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- Don’t be jealous, be INSPIRED
When you see talented people achieving the remarkable, it should inspire you to level up!
Surround yourself with people who believe in your dreams, encourage your ideas, support your ambitions, and bring out the best in you. Don’t compare yourself to others, let them motivate you instead!
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- Forgive yourself
Remind yourself that you are worthy of love and attention, or that it’s okay to make mistakes, we all do!
- Let go of control
It is important to let go of controlling, yes in every detail of your life. I remember this was a really scary thing in my recovery because you actually thought the world would end or something 😅
Focus on what you are hiding or avoiding by controlling your life, why do you need to control the things? What is bothering you? Who are you trying to prove yourself to? What do you think would happen if you just stopped? Let go?
Although we have alot to manage in our daily lives like jobs, relationships, family, exercise, sleep, and so on.. BUT the truth is, there are really a few things we have control over.
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- Accepting
You want to be in the position that you are not, making you overlook what you have already achieved.
Start to trust that things are OK just as they are. They might not be “ideal,” but they are just fine. Beautiful even. Become more aware of the present moment, practice (for example by meditation or for each day take a break for yourself and really remember to accept and be thankful for the small things in life).
You are doing the best that you possibly can at the moment. Be patient; continue working for your dreams and your success will come to you.
Life is a practice and when we practice we make mistakes. The desire for love and acceptance are universal. There is no shame in mistakes, just an opportunity to learn and to grow.
You are a process on your own, a work in progress ❤️